Howard Sternum

Robin O. Q.

Howard Sternum — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 23:35:34 GMT

Kiss ass, laughing bitch. HAHAHAHA HEHEHEHE. She used to have her own opinions and let Howard know when he was wrong, now she just licks his ass, and makes him think he's right. She needs to protect her poor little Howard.

Fuck her for not sticking up for Artie when he was arguing with Andrew Dice. She'll take Howard's side on any little thing.

???

Howard Sternum — Tue, 04 May 2010 08:01:01 GMT

The whole reason they tried to kill him, the whole reason he doesn't have his money, the whole reason they hate him, and they alowed it to happen way more then he ever did, and for a whole other reason, and explaination. Never trying to harm the other person, it's all justified, i'm sure. His reason was for you to do exactly what you did, send your army for him to defeat. He just got lost. So many times, and never once on the other, you guys suck. There was the one Mandy stabbed, the shooting he dodged, when you tried to make him deaf, when you threw rocks in his window, the one that got punched so many times, the one that tried to body bag him, when you opened up his head, the agent in spanish class, the dentist, and for what? To allow someone else to do what they want. Why can every one else do as they please, and he gets punished for every little flaw? You guys were just hurt, and had a reason to attack. If you really cared you would have taken care of business on the other one. One day you will answer, one day you will not be able to justify yourself.

You can only intervene, how many times? I forget. You're not going to know when. You didn't. It's all wrong, I'm not sure what to do now.

Howard The Jackass

Howard Sternum — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 23:34:22 GMT

Howard lives in a phycological world. For him everything is or can be defined by distinctions of phycology. He plays little phycologist on his show all the time; evaluating everyones "head". What is the phycological profile of someone who needs to phyco-analyze everything? I think Howard is too powerful for his psychiatrist. By now his psychiatrist is wrapped up in Howard's world. No progress could be made on Howard, he just likes learning the distinctions so he can use them on other people. He's not really seeing himself or who he is.

Stupid phycological evaluations:

Young boys can't have long hair

That whole evaluation about the supposed killer of Jon Bonet.

His dream analysis

Why women do the things they do sexually

The more Howard is confronted by his impact the less responsibility he will take and the more he will release his wrath on the world.

Howard says Mel Gibson hates the Jews. He puts Mel down, degrades his movie, and lashes out on him. Howard says that he himself is not a racist. I think someone who is not a racist is someone who 1) doesn't even consider race and 2) someone who doesn't make decisions based on race. If a black person comes in his studio Howard asks many racial questions: Is it hard being black? Do you only date black people? What was it like growing up black? Do you only date light skin blacks? Do you have a big penis? ...And many other questions that are geared toward stereotypes of black people. This in itself is not being a racist, and looks innocent. "I'm just asking some questions." But it does provoke racism, it does cause racism, and it does create stereotypes. Then the fire is fueled, and the audience calls in...

Who is he to talk about what Ronnie does or how he acts at his party. He used to be on FM radio, how does he know kids weren't listening. He cares so much about the kids at Ronnie's party but not the ones that could be listening to him. If he is so concerned about kids hearing those kinds of things, why doesn't he make his channel like the Play Boy channel, where you have to call and request it to be added on Sirius.

The news guy with a black wife made a great point on the wrap-up show. There is no balance on the show. There is just degrading people, and especially black people, and especially women.

Whenever people make a point he some how doesn't understand what they are saying. He understands retarded people and super intelligent people, but some how when someone makes a perfectly good point that goes against him, he doesn't know what they are talking about. Or, somehow forgets what they are referring to. Did I say that? And Robin plays right a long "what is this person saying? What are they talking about?" DUHHHH ...And then he hangs up on them.

Howard is only The Boss when it's convenient for him. When someone needs his help, and they go to Howard because they know he could easily solve their problem, He backs off and puts his hands in the air. "I'm not the one in charge around here." "Why does everyone come to me with their problems?" But when he wants something done, everyone has to move to his command, and he is all of a sudden King of Shit.

I love how Howard thinks he is better than all of the disgust he surrounds himself with, and acts like he is. Most evil, manipulating people have a strong pretense of looking like good citizens. It's like the rapist who won't speed. Hitler was no slob. He made fun of the people on the Real Doll documentary. He laughed at how they purchased, used, and had the dolls sit around in a bed room. He did all of these things. He bought a real doll - of which he couldn't wait to get, he used it, and it sat in the studio every day at KROQ.

How is taking responsibility for someone else's actions being just like every other liberal? Is not taking responsibility, and just worrying about yourself being just like every other conservative? Once again Garry tried to bring a possibility outside of the realm of The Howard Stern Show and Howard just shot it down and killed it.

Howard always says that if Bush's kids had to go to war then the war would be over. What if I wanted to prank call his mom, or his daughters, or Beth?

It's a misconception that Hitler hated the Jews; he was just trying to make the human race better. I've heard Howard and Artie throw that word around a few times "misconception" -HA

Stephen Fred Eric King

Howard Sternum — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 04:51:09 GMT

Is Fred sick? If you think about a writer like Stephen King, and you subscribe to the theory that he is sick, then you would say Fred is also. Stephen King has to think of morbid cinereous, and consider lots of death. Fred plays a laughing sound at some pretty sick times. So you have to consider the situation bad enough to be sad, but have it be funny in your head to play that sound. I don’t think Fred is a good or evil person. He’s just kind of stagnant. But I also think Howard could blow up a baby in front of him and he’d still come into work.

Death Pool

Howard Sternum — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 02:31:01 GMT

Ben

Ray

Artie

Robin

Howard

Fred

Gary

Bengie

The High School Bomb

Howard Sternum — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 23:47:12 GMT

A student’s big day; where he gets to take that walk into a new world and start an independent life. Where he gets to take what he has learned and apply it to something bigger. Where a teacher will try to blow you up in your own family’s car.

His plan was simple: “I’ll just let him graduate, take the walk, get his degree, meanwhile my son will be on his way, plant the bomb in his family’s car, I have the button, I push the button while they are driving away. Simple, right? This is my last chance. I’ll get you this time my sweety!”

The student is sitting in a small section of a huge stadium feeling awkward and out of place. Wearing strange looking black and white shoes that make him stand out a little. His line is next, he stands and walks to the stage full of decorated teachers shaking hands, smiling, and giving hugs. His name is called. He shakes a hand, gives a high five, and then runs to the end. Something takes him over. There is a teacher of his at the end - Mr. Miller. He stops and smiles big at recognizing him. The teacher says something cruel and evil. The student then walks swiftly toward the teacher and gives him a big hug – Nothingness. There is a button on his back, push it! It’s pushed. Sadness comes over the teacher's face. The teacher mumbles something in disbelief, and the student walks away.

The button triggered a bomb, a bomb that went off in his own son’s car. And somehow the student is the evil one.

Conspiracy Theories

Howard Sternum — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 00:54:59 GMT

How did Robin’s Dad really die?

- Was he Killed

- Was this the reason why she flew him to NY

Did Jackie really smoke pot?

- Was it just an image

Will Howard pretend to die, and then go into hiding?

- Does he just want to be left alone

- Is this the best way to get out of it

- Does he want to avoid the backlash that he gives people who leave the famous life

Does Artie really do coke, heroine, bet with bookies?

- How much can you function doing all these things

- Does he want you to keep guessing

Who is really being themselves?

- Is it all a facade

Did Artie really stab himself?

- Was it attempted murder

- Was it really an overdose of drugs or some other medical condition

Welcom to My Carnival

Howard Sternum — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 04:49:48 GMT

[Video]

Revelations

Howard Sternum — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 19:17:13 GMT

Everyday I wake up and think about the scum-bags that have my money, and the pieces of shit that tried to kill me, and I want revenge. So, here are some revelations until I get my money or revenge.

O.Q. was supposed to give A.S. a recording of a conversation. A very important conversation. But she knew there were things on there that would get her in trouble. She panicked and thought it was the end for her. Then M.D. gave her an idea to splice the tape physically. She could cut the tape and mend it back together. I guess it worked.

Joe started to hide things way before O.Q. did. Things that wouldn't have been apporved of. But he wanted to experiment - just like a true wicked scientist.

What is A.S. hiding? He needed to get it out of his system. O.Q. showed him a picture from his past. A man that was beaten with a sack over his head.

Everything that was told to D.A. when he bought M.D. those fries was a lie. That wasn't the right way to do it.

Dominique was killed

Who is Vinnie? - The next John, the next Howard? - I think he rides a motorcyle or did

Joe's son's bomb went off in his own car

Talking Shit

Howard Sternum — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 16:00:52 GMT

According to Howard whenever someone on another show makes a bad comment about him or his show they are doing it in bad taste, and Howard disapproves. He can talk all the shit he wants, but somehow he is doing it on fair grounds. No one likes to hear others talk shit about them, but you would think if you were talking all kinds of shit all day you would understand why people would talk shit back. He cries when others attack Beth; it's like going to war and saying shoot me but don't shoot my friend. I can make a song parody about you, make fun of the way you look, talk, and present yourself, but don't you dare talk about my girlfriend or the way I do my show. Maybe the things he says are not fair ground for the other party. Like maybe wishing someone cancer, or a divorce, or death, or to be unpopular.

NEWS FLASH

Howard Sternum — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 10:06:16 GMT

YOU ARE A MONSTER!

America’s Psychologist

Howard Sternum — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 05:10:37 GMT

Howard really understands and sees how his parenting effects his children. If he were to hit them it would cause distrust in their relationship; he clearly sees the impact of his parenting. But when it comes to his show he is oblivious. Everyone is an adult so all is fair and game. I wonder what the psychological damage there would be in calling a retarded person and convencing them they are not retarded, then letting them know that they really are, and then pretend to send that person to the moon. Or rewarding people when they get angry, and say negative things to others. People around him hold him higher than they do their own parents. In any establishment, organization, or group there is always someone that everyone else looks up to, and looks for advise, leadership, and what to do next. Howard is that person in his world. If he can understand why putting soap in a little kids mouth is not psychologically healthy, then why can’t he understand the position he is in, and impact he has on the people around him.

Hell's Bells

Howard Sternum — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 00:29:39 GMT

Magneto's helmet was created by Professor X to keep Professor X out of Magneto's mind. It ended up working against him.

Ring Hell's Bell

Once to do as I command

Twice to create a new personality

Thrice to forget

The Killer Dentist

Howard Sternum — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 00:23:46 GMT

In a new dentist office. Equipment is not all setup. Patient is laying in the dental chair. A woman dressed as a dentist assistant whips up a killer rise for her target.

She said<softly>: Ok, now rinse your mouth with this. Don't spit it out. It's a one minute mouth rinse, but we don't have a sink. It won't harm you to swallow it. <walks out of room>

One minute later

It says: Spit it out

He Thinks: She said to swallow it, it's been one minute

It says: Don't you see there is a sink there

He Thinks: There isn't a sink, just swallow it

<flash, white, nothing>

He spit it out, it's on the floor

The Show - Star Review

Howard Sternum — Thu, 20 Mar 2008 18:23:28 GMT

The Howard Stern Show gets better and better, and is in an overall incline. If you could picture the incline as going backward - like going up, backward on a rollercoaster. For the most part I can’t stop listening. It’s like Howard has put a hook in my mouth and tugs on it threw the speakers. …Hooked, manipulated, because you have to.

The Howard Stern Show is a contradiction inside of an enigma all wrapped up in a joke on the world that few people get. Howard’s interview with Barbra Walters is a perfect example of this. He was asking her controversial questions that she would deny. Howard would then ask again, or in another way, as if doubting her answers. When she brought up an article in the news paper about him saying he doesn’t want to marry Beth anymore because of all the hassle that people are giving him, he wanted to deny everything. But she (imitating him) wouldn’t let him answer and kept doubting his answers. When she pulled the same tactic on him, he couldn’t handle letting her rant on like he was doing to her, and does all the time. He could then say that was the joke. He was intentionally doing that to be funny and you are dumb if you didn’t get it. But you would never know if he was reacting like that because he was trying to be funny or if he really can’t handle a taste of his own medicine. And anybody else's evaluation of this is looking too deep into it. But he can be deep when he wants, and don’t question that!

It’s like listening to a bunch of people try to figure out life. But they are five and have a lot of money and time. They have problems, they question why the way things are, but never have any real resolution to things. Their lives are like a cliff hanger that never gets answered.

Resolution: Howard wakes up and starts appreciating the life he has, and is happy with Beth, and just wants others to be happy with their lives. He would say that is what is true now; but it sure in the hell doesn't look like he is expressing that. Robin stops trying to prove that she can make it in the world, and starts making a difference for people. Fred starts to talk, and realizes he is just as interesting to people as Howard is. Artie gets committed to losing weight, starts going to church with his family, and lets go of losing his dad.

Ralphie Cakes

Howard Sternum — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 23:37:43 GMT

A modified version of Howard. His opinions are all modified opinions of Howard. When something is wrong they both have the same sigh, that **uhgg** noise they make.

Howard is in love with Ralph. He always takes his side, defends Ralph, and justifies everything when Ralph is wrong. Why does he let Ralph call up and yell at others on his staff, like Gary. Gary is a producer, working his ass off in the back ground, then he does one thing wrong and Howard yells at him, and then lets Ralph call in and tell Gary how he can do his job better.

Ralph does the stupidest movie for the Film Festival, where it's so obvious that it is not going to be anything but credits, and Howard praises it and says it's the best staff film. There is creative funny and there is not creative and not funny. Ralph is the latter.

When Sal suggest that Ralph should not be on the wrap-up show, Howard cries and says Sal can't be on the show just for suggesting that.

Ralph is so lost in the reality of Howard. I think that even Howard feels sorry for him. Because even Howard knows that it's not real.

If someone managed a project of mine where I put hidden cameras in someone's home and stole every joke and every creative thought they had, I'd kiss their ass too. If I had someone go out in the field and find out things about celebrities and report back to me on their lives ...yeah, I'd kiss their ass too. I'd kiss their ass so no one would ever find out.

Please keep him off the Howard Stern Show, the Wrap-Up Show, and the Friday Show!!!!!

A Pill to Make You Dumb

Howard Sternum — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 03:51:08 GMT

Sometimes people in power think they have the right to supress other people's expression of their power. They think they have the right to make decisions on how this person should be, and the way they should think. Instead of just letting the person be their own person, and recognizing that they don't have the capacity to contain this person - they give them a pill. A pill to make their genius go away, to make them forget, to make them nothing, to give themselves control.

Who is Funny

Howard Sternum — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 07:49:54 GMT

The only funny one on the show is Artie. Howard is intersting and engaging, but not really funny. I think he really wishes he was funny. Many times Artie will say something really creative and funny and Howard will try to piggy-back on it. Artie will say something like "what a cunt face" and Howard will then say something like "what a BIG cunt face". None of his radio skits are funny: The Gay Robot, Bareback Moutain ... Although, the song paradies are funny, and well done. Sometimes it like he is trying too hard, and so technical and fanatical about what he is joking about.

The "Real" Howard

Howard Sternum — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 11:39:50 GMT

Howard tells his audience that the real Howard is the Howard we hear on the air. Then he tells people off the air that his off air personality is the real him. He then tells his audience that he tells these people that so that they will trust him. But who knows what he tells the off air people about that, just to make them feel better. He also lets people calling in know that they don't really know him when they try to call him out on something. How do we not know anything about a person who constantly talks about himself? How do we evaluate this? What do we think about a person who is a Mr. Do-gooder off the air, and a dark, morbid, hating fool, spewing disgust on the air? If he is playing a character on the air, why would a person who is the way he is off the air choose to play such a character? We all have our own contradictions about ourselves, but this seams extreme. He set out to expose people of their hypocrisy, and has created the biggest one yet.

It's About Responsibility

Howard Sternum — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 23:21:28 GMT

It's ok to get an abortion, but don't put your dogs under or give them away when you can't take care of them.

-You're chosing to get an animal
-You're also chosing to have sex

-The fetus isn't born yet
-A 3 month old fetus is probably as aware as a 1 year old dog

-Why didn't Jamie Lynn Spears get an abortion? What's the problem with her parents?
-Why didn't Scott want to keep his dog? He should want it no matter what.

A Spliced Song For Howard

Howard Sternum — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 23:58:37 GMT

Fuck - - - -Howard Stern
Fuck his BIG - - - JEW- nose
I HATE- - - --his LONG- - - - -kinky -HAIR
Fuck -His STUPID- wife -too
What about those - TATTOOS -
They're not THAT - COOL-
GO BACK -in to - you're -CAVE
You smelling ass - - -- JEW
You have more -PROBLEMS- then all the -SHIT- you talk
Give us all a -BREAK- and - take that -long - - - -FUCKING- -WALK

A Man Named Joe

Howard Sternum — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 06:45:53 GMT

The white devil came to me. In his hat, with a smile. Yeah, I took him on, and tore him down best I could. But I never tried to kill him or his boss, like they did me. Nasty fucks. He looks like Bengie - maybe that's his dad. ...Bengie Miller.

Two Aids Don't Make a Life

Howard Sternum — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 17:00:16 GMT

Aid one: a student who is filling up an extra period for credits

Aid two: a substitute teacher, who isn’t really a substitute teacher. he’s Certainly In on A plan.

Aid one walks into his classroom; looking unaware and lost. While aid two opens a can of soda. Aid two hands the soda to aid one, and aid one takes it and sits down. Aid one takes a small sip, unsure of what is going on, or why this man gave him a drink. While tasting the soda he remembers a time of accidentally tasting ink; and how sweet it was. This was even sweeter. He swallows and proceeds with caution.

Aid two starts a small conversation with aid one and asks if he would like to help him with a crossword puzzle. Aid one leans over and reads the clues, never giving any answers to them. Aid two fills in a few and stops. Aid one asks why the regular teacher isn’t in, and if he knew Spanish. After all, this was a Spanish class. Aid two tells him that she is sick, and that he didn’t know Spanish, but did know French. French was taught the first two periods, and they couldn’t find someone who knew French and Spanish on a sort notice.

Aid two starts to ask him some questions, mostly trying to figure aid one out; getting into his mind. Aid one answers vaguely and asks if he could use the restroom. Aid two says ok, but to leave the soda. Aid one says ok and leaves.

He goes out into the court yard and sits. A girl comes by and sits right next to him. They begin to talk and he asks her if she would do something for him. He asks her if he gives her ten dollars would she go to his classroom and grab a can of soda sitting on his desk. She does it. While she is gone aid one buys another can of soda. She brings it back and he empties it into a flower bed. It is unclear if the girl took a sip, but her life would tell. He pours the new one into the old can, and sits for a minute. He finally decides to go back.

When he enters the room aid two looks upset and asked him why he took the soda. Aid one didn’t give much of an answer and sits down. Aid one tells him of a time when he was playing with a pen with his friends and the pen broke. Somehow some of the ink got into his mouth and there was a really sweet taste. He then tells him how amazing it is that such sweet things are so bad. “When I walked into the room, I saw you open the can, but I didn’t hear the sound a can usually makes when opened. And the can wasn’t filled completely to the top, like normal.” He then tells him all of the answers to the crossword puzzle, and a verse from a song:

Kyrie eleison Christe eleison . Je ne dors plus (the time has come) . Je te desire (the time has come) . Prends moi Je suis a toi Mea culpa . Je veux aller au bout de me fantasmes Je sais que cest interdit Je suis folle. je mabandonne . Mea culpa Kyrie eleison Christe eleison . Je suis la et ailleurs Je nai plus rien Je deviens folle Je mabandonne . Mea culpa . Je ne dors plus Je te desire Prends moi Je suis a toi . Kyrie eleison Christe eleison . Je suis la et ailleurs Je veux tout Quand tu veux Comme tu veux . Mea culpa Kyrie eleison

Aid two slouches in his chair. The kids in the room head for the door to await the bell to ring. A girl stands in front of aid one and asks for a drink of the soda. He gives it to her and she takes a drink. Aid two stands and yells NO! and sits back down knowing it’s too late. Aid two takes out a plastic bag full of white power and spoons it into a soda. Aid one watches and leaves as the bell rings. That night the boy eats a large slice of French bread and nothing else. He then awakens to a nauseous feeling, he runs to the bathroom and hurls as if his stomach were coming out. Luckily, the bread absorbed enough of the soda for him to still be alive. The next day, a teacher of his lets him know that “a good man died because of him.”

The History of Howard Stern - Part 1

Howard Sternum — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 05:03:30 GMT

Listening to the History of Howard Stern is the most heart-wrenching radio I’ve ever heard. You get in touch with a little boy who is living his passion. When you see or hear of a champion you always hear of their story, and how they wanted to be something and created a world of that; and that’s what Howard did. Everything around him was setup for him to become what he is – a Champion of Radio. It’s always inspiring to hear of someone who accomplished their childhood dreams, because few of us are able to do that.

Thrown From A Cliff

Howard Sternum — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 03:23:36 GMT

A girl was thrown from a cliff to her death. The murderers were targeting an 18 year old boy, but he didn't want to die.

Early in the morning the boy was called to the administration office at a high school in the hills. The boy was told that he was going to be on TV and they were shooting a scene. The scene required him to get in a long black bag. The two men who set the "scene" up told him that they would be back with cameras, and to get in the bag. When they got back they would start filming.

Just as they left a girl walked in. The kid told her the same story and she got in the bag. When the murderers came back in they saw the bag with a body in it. Assuming that it was the boy they taped it up and carried it to their trunk. They drove to a cliff next to the ocean and chucked the girl down.

The next morning a teacher, involved in the murder, told the boy that an innocent girl died because of him. He took his own responsibility, but the ones who planned and committed the killing did not.